Maranoia

Last night I dreamt I went to Manchester (again).

I got there too late, I couldn’t find the bag collection, and then suddenly I was running in what felt like gloop and my limbs wouldn’t really move. What a nightmare!

I’m not prone to anxiety, but since yesterday, I have suffered all the classic pre-race nerves. Such as: getting flickers of tightness in my calves, quads, hamstrings or any other part of my legs; feeling exhausted; having my stomach tied up in knots; not sleeping very well; being irritable.

I should have done the Chester 5 mile race yesterday but I ended up bottling it for all of the above reasons. It would probably have done me some good to go, to get rid of some of the tension inside me, but I ended up having a bowl of mint choc chip ice cream instead.

Aside from this blip, the last couple of weeks of tapering have made me think that this race may end up being quite enjoyable. All my niggles are starting to calm down, the weather is forecast to be rather nice, and I’m starting off with a fellow Pensby runner, John who is doing a phenomenal three marathons in a month! He’s already done Brighton at the beginning of April. He’ll be doing Manchester with me, and the week after he’ll be doing the (virtual) London marathon. Amazing.

I think I will enjoy it, whatever happens with my time, which could land me anywhere between 5 and 6 hours. But it’s not about the outcome folks, it’s all about the journey! And to be fair, I do feel – or I did before yesterday – stronger. I have more stamina, and I’m starting to see a little speed on the shorter runs. The numbers at the end would be nice if they were on the quicker side, but I won’t be worried if they’re not.

I’m going to have to pack my kit and bag tonight as we have a busy weekend with grandkids and a family wedding on Saturday. Luckily that’s in the afternoon so I will be able to squeeze in a little Parkrun in the morning to wake up my legs, ready for Sunday.

It’s probably a good thing that we’re busy over the next couple of days, so I don’t fall too far back into my doldrums. Let the time rush by and get me to that starting line in the blink of an eye.